29 May 2009

3:46 PM - 2 comments

Dear Republican Party

Dear Republican Party,

I was born a republican, because of scum bags like this i used to love my party but it seems that you are all full of shit. FOR REAL.

Today I turned on the TV and of course once again the party that I love decided that it would be a cool idea to hate against the Hispanics. For real people, do you really think that you will continue to be a majority party if you isolate the biggest and fastest growing minority.

We need to focus on things that matter, like this crazy dude who has 20 kids, we need to focus on small government and the national debt and fiscal responsibility. But instead we are calling civil rights groups KKK look alikes and Hispanic judges racist. I wish that it was just that nonsensical Rush but now we have Newt and Tancredo talking crap.

Okay let me try and make sense. watch the video below idiots and then sit down get a couple of cigars and strategize a way to reform and reclaim our party without calling other people names.

ticked off and trying not to scream

25 May 2009

12:59 PM - 1 comment

Dear Colin Powell

Dear Colin,

How long has it been, one could say that the last couple of years have set us on divergent paths but we still always have those first years to look back on. When Rush and Dick started mud slinging I wasn't sure how you would respond. I didn't know if you were going to ignore their jabs or if you would take their bait. I have to admit that I was hoping for the former but your recent comments of yesterday dashed my hopes.

Colin, why do you have to take bait. You do not have to defend your stance, your record serves as vindication enough. You don't need to tell us what we already know and explain the problems that we are well acquainted with.

I'm not sure if you breaking the silence helps your case or the party.
I don't know

I hope this memorial day is going well with you


12:43 PM - No comments
I normally don't write letters or telegrams or send post it notes to foreign head of states but the latest actions of Ahmadinejad and Yang have mii rethinking this agreement I made with the various nations.

In order to keep my head on my neck and to avoid contributing to the brewing hostilities between the nations I have held my peace

but now.....
Mahmoud is talking about not blocing facebook
Kim testing a nuclear missile


i wonder oooo

20 May 2009

5:01 PM - No comments

Dear Nancy Pelosi,

Dear Nancy,
I have no idea what is going on, i must admit that the actions of the last couple of weeks has baffled me. All i will say is this
clean up your junk so that you don't screw up my midterm elections

if i lose seats in the house because of this nonsense i will hold you responsible


2:56 PM - No comments

Dear Rush Limbaugh

Dear Rush,

Who elected you?
Who nominated you?
Who choose you?
Who made you the head of our party?
seriously, you are saying that you are resigning from being the head of the republican party who made you the freaking leader
what are you smoking and how can i get some to sell to pay down my credit card debt
for real
you are not and have never been the head of the republican party so please get off your behind
and shut up

i am not going to go on
but then again maybe you resigning from your fictious leadership position will shut you up.
so please resign from your dream job.


12 May 2009

7:16 PM - 2 comments

Dear Prez,

I do not appreciate your handling of the New York photoshoot flyover crisis. I understand that you have been fooled into thinking that you are a celebrity but that doesn't help your situation. These are serious times that deserve serious people and so think before you hire people so that you won't have to have to accept their resignations.

I really need you to tell Rahm to give mii a call we have some issues that need to be ironed out before the floor vote next week.


11 May 2009

7:19 PM - No comments

Dear Mike,

I use your nickname from our days at so as to appeal to your saner side. I previously sent a telegram in which I basically told you that this will be the last of our communication but your actions have one again caused me grief and so I HAVE to speak out and try and give you some advice you so desperately need.

I understand that your cousin's brother's sister's niece's baby's daddy works for the Colombian Drug Cartel but that doesn't mean that you have to smoke the junk they are selling. You seem to have forgotten what you job is so let mii remind you. Your job is to unite the party and to play party elder to the local political squabbles between it's members. It is not your job to pick fights or play favorites or to air our dirty laundry.

It is not your job to air our dirty laundry. I thought you understood this so imagine my surprise when Mitt calls me this morning to rage about your latest attack against him. I had just calmed down the Religious Right on the comments you made last month about abortion and now you are trying to cast doubt at our possible frontrunner for the 2012 presidential elections.


so please stop smoking junk and talking out the side of your mouth.
don't talk, don't say anything to anyone, even your wife, until you have gotten control of your mind.


7:13 PM - No comments

Dear Dick,

I have repeatedly asked you to refrain from talking in public places but for some reason you have chosen to ignore my request. The wise book of the good book says that even a fool is thought to be wise when they shut up and it is for this reason that i advised you to keep quiet so that your reputation might be salvaged.

What do you think it says about you to say you choose Rush Limbaugh over Colin Powell? I refuse to engage in the fallout to your words and its effect on our party

You insist to resist my advise and so I must take a harsher course of action in order to get thru to you. You know of what and who I speak, he will be contacting you in the next couple of minutes and don't try to hit the ignore button or he will make the 19 hour trip and will be there in person.